it all seemed so real

Do you ever listen to the words of a song, and think to yourself that you wish someone had said those words to you? Like if everything went the way you wanted it to, that person would have said exactly the words that you now hear every day in that song? Sometimes songs come along like that, and it makes me think about all of that stuff. All of the distance references in the song, "Hey There Delilah" can only make me think of a certain somebody who lives 1200 miles away and used to have my heart, but never loved me enough to do anything to be with me. Time has passed, but I'll never be able to deny how much I wish he would have found it in him to speak such lovely words of assurance and commitment (emphasis on past tense). I'm fine with everything now, because everything happens for a reason. I wouldn't be where I am today if that whole thing hadn't gone down, so I am content knowing that I'm where I'm supposed to be. God really does take care of everything, in the end. I'd rather Him hold my heart for the time being.

Also, I just re-discovered some of my old, old, old CD's that were hidden away in a drawer in my room, and I popped one of them in and I'm seriously loving it. Partly because it brings me back a little to those careless days before high school and jobs and responsibility... but partly because I really do like the particular album or song(s). For instance, I am listening to Vanessa Carlton's first album- Be Not Nobody, and I feel like I'm back in 8th grade again. I am usually pretty outspoken about my dislike for female vocalists, but lately I've widened my range because I'm finding there are definitely some female singers who can REALLY sing. Anyway, Vanessa Carlton's voice is kind of weird and so I kind of like it. I am a sucker for pretty piano songs though, so that probably has a lot to do with it too.

I went through an awkward stage where I thought I was too old and too cool to admit anymore that I still liked boy bands like Backstreet Boys and Nsync, but now that I'm a sophomore in college I think it's pretty safe to say I'll always like the catchy little tunes from good ol' Backstreet and N*sync, or N*suck as I used to call them because you couldn't be a fan of both while they had their prime reign over pre-teen girls around the world.

That's all I've got for now. Goooooooooodnight.