Frustration.

Sometimes life can be really frustrating. Everyone gets frustrated. And right now, frustrated is the only word that can describe me best. My health has been very much in the spotlight of my life lately, and although some things are WAY better, other things are not. I guess it's stupid for me to hold on to some kind of fantasy that I'm just going to all the sudden never have any bit of sickness affecting my body and mind. Everybody gets sick sometimes, with colds and allergies and what not, but the things that I deal with are on top of all of those "normal" kinds of sick. My main frustration is coming from a side effect of a new medicine that I'm on, and it basically has made me have a lack of appetite. Doesn't sound so bad on its face, but as applied it is causing me lots of problems. I just got my wisdom teeth out, and I was so nauseous from the pain medicine that I threw up anything I tried to eat the first 3 or 4 days after the surgery, and then slowly began eating solid food again after that. So I already went days without eating much. Then this new medicine started to effect my appetite, and it virtually makes me never hungry for food except for maybe one time throughout the day. Day after day after day it has been like this. It isn't easy to make yourself eat food when you don't feel the need to eat at ALL. But then I miss the feeling of being full after eating, and all of it together is just really frustrating. Because of this, I have dropped 10 pounds in 2 weeks and I was already a very thin girl... 10 pounds off of me is not good. I am down to 107 pounds, for a girl who is 5'6 and a quarter tall. It's bad.

It's hard to not throw up my hands and just say "I can't"
I have to fight off the weariness every day, because I don't want to let this defeat me like I have let sickness do so in the past. I'm just learning as I go how to deal with all of this stuff. God must think I can eventually handle it, so I'll trust in that.