Loosening the grip.

It's sad that one day can unravel months, even years, of growth in a friendship. There are some disappointments in life you just can't ever be prepared for, and seeing someone for who they really are is one of them. Especially when you see them in a light you wish had never been turned on... because it's ugly.

One thing I have learned about living is that you can't fix your friends. Along with that, you have to weigh the mistakes and the consequences and their impact on you, and figure out what's best for yourself- not them. Otherwise, it's just not healthy.

All people have patterns. Most of life contains cycles that we fall in and out of. When you start seeing a bad pattern in someone you have always held in high opinion, things can get a little difficult and complicated. You have an attachment to the past of this person, but you have a "detach button" ready to be hit for the present, because you look out into your future and you see them continuing their patterns over and over and over again, and it's just too much to ask yourself to overlook all the hurt and all the problems it's going to cause you later on... not to mention what it's already caused you at the present moment.

I never used to be able to detach myself from anybody. Even the most destructive of relationships. But I can now. The question now is, how do I know which function to practice, and to what extent? I am at a loss for words at this point.